| Tarantinos The Lord of The Rings |
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| Por Folco | |
| 25 de junho de 2005 | |
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Página 3 de 28 Everybody in the party claps and smile! MERRY: Lets do it again! Gandalf gets comes up and slaps Pippins face. GANDALF: You little dirty motherfuckers! Bilbo stands up on top of a table. BILBO: Everybody!!! Please, look here! Speach!! Everybody at the party looks at him, quiet. BILBO: Well, I wanna thank all of you! Such wonderfull bunch of assholes! The Blowjobers, Assfuckers, Baggins, Tuks, Brandybucks, Pussylovers! All of you! Although I dont like half aswell as you deserve and half of you I like half as much as I would like to deserve aswell as like, but like half of you half aswel as you would like me to deserve all of you! Everybody look at each other. Nobody understood what Bilbo just said. BILBO: The truth is... Well, I hate all of you! Goodbye, motherfuckers, you can stick the whole Bag End up your asses! Bilbo puts on the ring and becomes invisible. Everybody is shocked! We are now inside Bilbos house. The door opens slowly and then closes. We suddenly see Bilbo appearing out of nowhere. He took the ring of his finger. Bilbo hears a voice. GANDALF: Come here, in the bedroom. Bilbo enters the bedroom and sees Gandalf in his bed. GANDALF: I was waiting for you! BILBO: Not now, Gandy. Not now. GANDALF: Whats the problem? BILBO: I got to get the fuck out here before anyone sees me! GANDALF: Not even a blow... BILBO: No! GANDALF: Alright, do what you want! But are you sure you are going to take the ring? You saw what Saruman did! He might find you, kill your motherfucking ass and take the ring. What is this ring, anyway? BILBO: I dont know. GANDALF: Are you sure? BILBO: Yes I am, Gandalf. Ill leave it to Frodo anyway. GANDALF: The ring? BILBO: No, my ass!!!! Of course its the ring.! GANDALF: You know Frodo is still in his adolescence. He might use the ring for masturbation, since he cant get any sex in the Shire. BILBO: Dont worry about Frodo, the goats take care of his sexual desire. GANDALF: Ok. Do what you want! BILBO: Goodbye, Gandalf! GANDALF: Goodbye, you little bastard! Bilbo starts walking to the door. GANDALF: Bilbo, arent you forgetting something? BILBO: What? Gandalf gets a dildo from under Bilbos bed. BILBO: Oh, yeah! I almost forgot! GANDALF: Remember, Bilbo. Safe sex! BILBO: Alright, Ill leave the ring on the table. GANDALF: Alright, get the hell out of here already! Your starting to piss me of!!!!! |
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