| Tarantinos The Lord of The Rings |
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| Por Folco | |
| 25 de junho de 2005 | |
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Página 6 de 28 THE NEXT DAY Its morning. Frodo and Sam are walking and walking and walking through plains and valleys and grass and woods. SAM: So, what are we doing? FRODO: I dont know. Something about a ring, a... a race car... a bee... SAM: A bee? Dont you mean Bree? FRODO: Yes, we must get to Bree. SAM: Why? FRODO: How the fuck should I now? SAM: Well, because youre the fucking Ring Bearer! FRODO: Lets go to Bree. Ok? SAM: Ok. FRODO: And Sam, Im sorry I spyed on you. That thing, you know? You and Rosie... SAM: No problem. FRODO: Is she good in bed? SAM: Rosie? Naaaaa... Average. I had better sex. Boy, I would like to screw an elf. I mean, they have super speed for something, right? Man, an elf in bed has got to be a dream! FRODO: Well... You will never meet an elf, so forget it. SAM: Wait. FRODO: What? SAM: This is the most far I have been from home. They stop walking. FRODO: Look! A car on the background! SAM: Where? Sam looks behind and Frodo pulls him. SAM: Hey! FRODO: Lets go! We dont have time for this. SAM: Well, I saved your life, Im coming with you with a ring that has the power to destroy Middle-Earth. You should give me a fucking break! Frodo and Sam are walking on a huge plain, nothing around them. Suddenly, Merry and Pippin appear out of nowhere. SAM: Merry? Pippin? MERRY: What? FRODO: What the hell are you doing here? MERRY: We dont know. We had to go with you on this trip with you. It was Tolkiens original plan. But some cheeseball called Peter Jackson didnt want the original way we would meet, as seen in Tolkiens book. So, the fucker comes up with his own way of us to meet. But Folco Gamgee didnt like that way, so the bastard wrote it this way. It was fucking destiny. FRODO: Ok. Were going to Bree. PIPPIN: Ok. Lets go! So, there they were. The four hobbits. Walking their way into a wild trip, where courage and honor are very important. PIPPIN: Im hungry. MERRY: No food. PIPPIN: Im really hungry! MERRY: Well, you can suck my balls if you want to. FRODO: We aint stopping until we get to Bree. |
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